These Signs Are All We Really Want to See in Our Lives

This sign is a bit confusing. Is Sean Doherty trying to sell houses or water guns? We really hope it’s the latter. He could be the first ever door-to-door water gun salesman, helping with all your squirting needs. Those jabronies from across the street are about to meet a supersoaker that will blast them into space.

If he ever showed up at our doorstep, we would probably be more interested in purchasing a water gun than a house. We have our priorities straight. Although admittedly, his suit does seem a bit fancy for getting wet. Maybe he wears something else for water fights.

Drinking coffee in a coffee shop? Absolute madness! The sad part is if you were to actually picture a guy sitting alone in Starbucks, looking at the people around, with nothing but his coffee mug on the table, you'd probably think he was a weirdo too.

This guy is not a parent, and he's proud of it! Probably tired of seeing the typical 'perfect family' bumper sticker on every other SUV, this guy decided he would customize one of his own. He took that very same format of stick people representing each of the family members and, well, laid out the family members.

You know, the partner and the Benjamins. Every last one of them. So, for anyone who asks, Yes, he's in a relationship, and no, they don't have kids. And yes, they're VERY happy and have loads of money! Take that for a bumper sticker!

The First United Methodist Church is all about spreading the good word, but they are also about not melting into a puddle in that unbearable heatwave so they have to get creative. Hence this gem. This is our kind of sign: honest, concise, and to the point.

Bottom line, ladies and gentlemen, sin is bad, Jesus is good, and if you want more details, just come inside (where there is air conditioning, which is also good), because it's way too hot to explain it all in a sign! We would be curious to hear the rest of the details, wouldn't you?

To be honest, we've never wondered about this before, but now that we've seen this sign, it does make us think. Can you believe there's a chance you never knew that your pet got as nervous as you did every time they saw one of those German Shepherd cops walk by?

Since dogs don't see colors in the same way as humans do, it's not like they can recognize them by their blue suits, so maybe it's just certain types of dogs that set off a warning. Even if they weren't police dogs, who in their right mind would go near a German Shepherd or a Rottweiler without a little caution?

You know how they say that guns don't kill people — people kill people? Yeah, the same goes for dogs. If you train your dog to bark at strangers, that's what it will do, but if you train it to roll on its back and ask the stranger for belly rubs, then that's what it will do.

Here we seem to have a case of a dog that was trained to be a friendly, cuddly creature, and an owner who prefers to defend their property with something a little more explosive. No problem, we'll stay off your lawn. Can we still pet your dog, though?

There's nothing more dangerous than a sign. Its bright yellow color, the black font, the "sharp" edges. Definitely far more dangerous than the bridge beyond it. And don't even get us started on what's PAST the bridge. There are even MORE signs. More scary fonts and more sharp edges.

Maybe that sign needs another warning sign to let us know about this one. We do appreciate the humor, though, since obviously, whoever made this sign clearly meant it as a joke. And if you're not convinced, just read the cheeky fine print below that reads "Also, The Bridge Is Out Ahead".

This is just brilliant. We applaud this church's successful attempt to blend pop culture and religion. Wouldn't you be more open to attending Sunday mass if you saw this sign outside of the church? We certainly would, even if it was just to hear if the pastor was planning on making any more Star Wars references.

Gotta love a Pastor who's a Star Wars fanatic. If he ever feels like taking it one step forward, let us propose a Yoda mascot greeting people with "May the Force of God be with you" as they are coming to church. Full house during Sunday service guaranteed.

While most signs on this list are humorous, this one is actually as wholesome as it gets. These words are a good lesson for all of us. Building a longer table means sharing what you have with others and being more accepting. Building a taller fence means keeping to yourself and pushing strangers away.

Life isn’t always easy, and everybody needs a helping hand sometimes. If you can reach out and help someone who really needs it, you probably should. There’s a reason people say giving back is its own reward — you won’t believe how good it can make you feel.

Bravo. Our deepest respects go out to whoever had the guts to actually advertise their motel like this. In fact, if we were to ever pass this sign by the side of the road, we'd definitely make a turn and go check out this fancy establishment. If only just to meet the owner. And their marketing and art department, of course.

Nothing screams 'fancy' like a handwritten sign attached to four poles in the middle of nowhere. We are sure this motel is so busy it's turning down customers left and right. Maybe we should make reservations for next year.

If my feet are shoes, why don’t they keep me warm in the winter? And if they are, in fact, shoes, then what is the actual foot? The part of the skeleton they cover, perhaps? These questions and others will make this sign a staple in any philosophy course around.

Even better, this sounds like great homework, please write 2,000 words by Tuesday discussing the theory of feet being shoes. The sign makes this look more like an existential Google search than a shoe store. The 50% off sign in the front window clearly shows that business is not booming.

While some people might find this sign a little cheesy, we absolutely loved it. To be fair, this sign is completely logical — you would expect a whole lot of nothing in a museum of space and air. From a scientific perspective, though, it's a little inaccurate.

Actual "nothing" would be a vacuum. A void of nothingness. But the air we breathe is most definitely not nothing! It's got all the oxygen we need to live! Plus carbon dioxide and a bunch of other molecules and stuff. Looks like Mr. Sign needed to pay a little more attention in science class.

Maybe this guy decided to play a prank on his buddy and welcome him home with a joke. Or maybe, this guy was actually proposing to a longtime partner — in which case we hope he said yes, even though it's not the classiest of proposals, to say the least.

We have to congratulate this guy — either for having the guts to pop the question in a crowded airport, or dealing with the fallout jokes that were surely made after people probably started taking pictures and posting this online. Tom should also be congratulated for keeping up with his shenanigans.

This just made us cry with laughter, which we’re sure was the sign’s intention, because what would really be the problem with a gay walrus that wants to jump from the sea to say hi to the people on the bridge? How do you know he's gay anyway? Has anyone ever seen his partner? Does he watch "RuPaul's Drag Race"? Does he have a Grindr profile?

And even if he is gay, how do we know he's fine with this sign outing him to the world like that? Anyways, you should be careful, walruses are quite massive. So yeah, maybe you should look over your shoulder to see if there are any jumping around, gay or not.

It's not easy being a referee, and we aren't just talking about the nasty things people might shout at you from the bleachers. No one remembers the hundreds of calls you got right and you can’t stop hearing about the one people think you got wrong. Usually, this is because it could make or break the game.

This kid found a creative way to say what’s on everyone’s mind, with a giant phone showing a “missed call” from, you guessed it, the referee. It’s pretty amazing that he had that made and brought it with him to pull out at just the right moment.

Ironically, if humans could choose a kind of pet to operate any kind of radiology device, they would probably have chosen dogs over cats. Something tells us that canines have better bedside manners than felines, and humans need that when someone is taking a picture of their innards.

Being a delivery guy is not the best job in the world. There are a few perks like working outside, occasional tips, and a close friendship with a number of jumpy dogs, but it’s not exactly the stuff most dreams are made of. This homeowner decided to passively aggressively educate their deliveryman about the proper use of a doorbell.

Hey buddy, since when has knocking become a crime? You could just ask nicely you know. Although admittedly it may be annoying if this happens more than once. Something tells us that there were quite a few missing packages before that sign was put up.

It's like when kids in class start making noise and only when their teacher is at the end of their wits do the kids understand that each of them needs to just promise to be quiet and commit to that promise. We think this is a totally legitimate request. What if we eliminated politics altogether and promised to live in peace and just be cool to each other?

We all have the same definition of cool, right? Taking into account the latest issues in politics, this idea doesn't sound so far-fetched, don't you think? It's utopic, we know. But it makes you smile for a few seconds to even consider the possibility, doesn't it?

This list features quite a few signs that property owners have put on their land to ward off any unwanted visitors. This, however, is the only sign that uses the visitors' remains to get the message across. We don’t have a bone to pick with this sign; it’s great. This person clearly loves his privacy and that’s exactly what he will get after people see this sign.

Yes, we probably think the bones are from the animals that died on his land and he just piled them up there as a joke. However, we are not willing to take that chance to find out if those bones are real or are actually from past trespassers.

We don’t want to add insult to injury, but if you lean on that barrier you will be adding insult to your own injury and you will have no one to blame but yourself and your poor reading skills. We can imagine the embarrassment one would feel when leaning against that and then falling.

But, triggering the sprinkler system and getting wet after falling would be the icing on the cake. Good luck getting up off the floor when you're both bruised and wet. Good thing that sign is there because we couldn’t imagine going normally about your day after such an incident.

Workplaces can be dangerous. Sure, your computer probably won't kill you, but anyone who works with power tools or heavy machinery needs to be a little more careful than the average office worker. That is why there are so many signs warning employees of potential hazards in factories and such.

This sign takes the cake and if we saw it, we would be extra cautious around that machine. We want to go home with all of our body parts and just looking at this sign shows us they will be severed into six different pieces. Good luck playing catch with your child if you fail to follow this sign.

Don't judge a book by its feathers. Just because something has a beautiful, colorful plumage, doesn't mean it wants to be your friend. While peacocks are adorable and one of the prettiest birds in the animal kingdom, that doesn’t mean that they won't defend their territory.

When feeling threatened, they will absolutely unleash all hell on you and everything you stand for. Their pecks will hurt and they can draw blood. We wonder how many people got attacked before this zoo had to put up sign warning guests to avoid approaching the precocious peacock. Our guess is above one, but below a lot.

If you have ever traveled to South East Asia, you are bound to run into a few monks. Usually with a shaved head and wearing traditional robes in bright orange, they may be asking for donations or trying to help you, but beware, not all is as it seems.

This sign was posted to warn people about the FAKE Monks in the area. We don’t condone anyone who steals an identity to make a profit off of others. You’ve been warned! So, if you see this sign and a monk in the area, remember they may not be who they say they are.

The war between graffiti artists and city councils is a long, drawn-out affair full of layers of paint. Any city dwellers can tell you that. City councils hate cleaning up graffiti, but we hope they laughed when they saw this one; we know we did.

We can only imagine what the tagger was thinking when they walked past this and the “I have an idea!” lightbulb flashed over their head. We don’t condone defacing public property, but if you do, try to make the city council laugh. This is one of the very rare occasions where adding to the mess makes it better!

We love a good threat sign as much as the next person; “Beware of Dog” signs are one of our favorites, however, we don’t think this sign can follow through on its threats. One major loophole is they never specify which players they're referring to, or even if they have to play a sport of any kind.

They could be playing Romeo in a community theater production of "Romeo and Juliet". They could be playing an instrument too! So as long as you play something and consider yourself a player you can collect all the golf balls you want. Happy collecting to all you cellists out there.

It’s no surprise why this family decided to put up a "Beware of Grandma" sign outside their front door; she bit the mailman when they delivered the post the other day. We also saw her barking from the porch when we walked by, and she did her business in the front yard next to the hydrant.

If you walk by this house beware because that grandma both barks and bites. Also, on an unrelated note, we'd like to know who Axel was and what he did to have his skull respectfully mounted by the gate. Maybe Grandma used to have a guard bull before learning to defend her property?

Sometimes life doesn’t feel like it’s going your way, but this sign is giving us some words of wisdom. Maybe the best course of action would be to stop fighting to get your way and roll with the tides to see where it takes us.

We never saw a sign that made us think about life that way, and maybe looking at something different is all we need to get out of our rut. Remember if the first left doesn’t work, consider trying another and then another. Then maybe those three lefts will make the right you need in your life.

We found it. The place where all lost things go. If you ever lose anything at this Tustin Dino Dash Race (which is where this picture was taken, apparently), just head over to this sign and explore away.

We know that sometimes we enjoy looking through the lost and found to see if there is anything interesting and you can do that here too. Lost glasses? Find them there. Need a new blanket? Have at it. Lost your child? Pick the one that looks closest to yours and head out. It will be like yours, but with a new twist.

It’s never a good sign when the sign doesn’t take its own advice. It should be more careful when it crosses a platform with holes in it. Now, if a person comes by there will be no way to warn them of the impending danger.

We hope they see the fate of the "Caution Wet Floor" sign and are careful if they go down the same path. In the sign's defense, wooden boards don't really get slippery when wet. What that sign needed is another sign to warn it about that part of the floor that has dangerous holes in it.

"Frozen" was one of our favorite movies; "Frozen 2"... not so much. So, whenever we see a "Frozen" joke we will stop and laugh. It doesn't have to be a very good joke. Like, how Elsa probably will never get married because she always has cold feet. See? Bad joke but it still works and it still made our day slightly better.

This one is pretty great, and we are glad we are not driving. Drivers laughing hysterically on the road might cause an accident. Luckily, we just saw it from this picture and can laugh without putting anyone in danger.

They say that the way to anyone's heart is through their stomach, but what is the way to the stomach? Well, that, dear friends, is through the brain. And the way to the brain? Humor them. Just like here. "Romain" calm, everybody, this one had us laughing too.

We couldn’t walk by this pun and not stop in for a bite to eat. The meal would surely make our heads turnip and our taste buds dance. It might even make our hearts "beet." If we are lucky we could eat our meal in peas and quiet. Although, a bit of company would be "rad-ish" too. "Lettuce" pray we have a great time at the happy hour.

Everyone is trying to make people laugh these days and that includes churches, which is pretty smart, to be honest. The best way to make someone more open and receptive is to make them laugh. A couple of chuckles and all of a sudden people feel a little more inclined to wake up on time for Sunday service.

This Mountainview Alliance Church got funny with their prayers, but we hope the big guy's wireless plan costs less than the AT&T bill we got last month. Granted, theirs may only cost an hour of time for full reception throughout the week. But if it doesn’t, do you know if God has a Venmo?

We are genuinely curious about why there is an either-or on this sign. Especially with the farting bit. How much of an impact would that passing gas have to call for a warning sign? Even if we were feeding them and they did fart, their butts are on the other side away from us, so we wouldn’t be affected.

Yes, it might smell in the vicinity of where we are standing, but  it wouldn’t cause us bodily harm and it is hardly something we would need to be warned about. Biting, on the other hand, can cause harm and anyone would appreciate the head's up.

At rallies and protests, you will see a plethora of signs, and some make you double-glance more than others. Maybe they will have more glitter on them, or maybe they will have a huge Fabio cutout character — those things are are to look away from. In some cases, like here, the message on the sign is just too good to ignore.

This science sign was seen at the Raleigh, NC march for science funding. They are not wrong because a lot of chemistry does go into making beer. If we stop funding science, then we are stopping funding beer makers, and that is not a world we want to live in.

Honestly, we had to ask around what was wrong with the sign because we read it 10 times and couldn’t figure it out. Then fingers were pointed and we put our palms to our faces. To be fair, if anyone was driving in their car past the sign, there is every possible chance they didn't have the time for the double take required to see the typo.

Have fun if you also struggle to find what is funny about this. Our brains are amazing and will “fix” little mistakes when we read information. This makes us wonder what else our brains gloss over that is incorrect.

It’s hard to argue with that logic. They are technically correct that if your parents didn’t have kids then you won’t either because for you to exist then they would need to have kids. Actually, if they never had you they would never have been your parents, which would make the whole narrative collapse. Unless there is time travel involved.

We are glad our parents did have us because now we can laugh at this sign and think about other useless information that we can put on a sign. Like “no numbers from 1-10 have the letter "A" in them.”

Does this bar really expect us to put down our phones and talk to the people at our table?! We barely have enough social skills to talk to another person on the phone! What has this world come to? Next time they might ask us to call a restaurant for takeout instead of using Postemates!

That is why we primarily text. We don’t know what we would do if they really didn’t have any wifi. Luckily, our phones have a hotspot option so we can all share TikToks while we drink our beer because who needs to chat in person?

Normally, cars display what they really think with bumper stickers, but this driver said screw that and went straight to spray paint. This is probably the closest thing to a tattoo that a car can get. We guess this car might be luck in a way, to be decorated in such a way.

He seems pretty set on his ideals to permanently mark his bumper, but we disagree. Although we may not know our neighbors, we find a community based on similar interests instead of just proximity. All people need to do is find their group, which includes this person too.

Some days just don't work. The office is hectic, your hair is a mess, people are jerks, the car needs an oil change, and there are three loads of laundry waiting for you at home. On those days we just want whiskey for lunch. No need to bother with tomato or chicken noodle soup, just pour us a big bowl of Johnny Walker and we will be happy.

Add a side sandwich and we will be in heaven. Is it the most nutritious? No, we will lack some Vitamin A, but on cold days, both will warm our bodies and sooth our souls.

We can only imagine what the storage room of this fish shop looks like. Our guess is that it's essentially a deck overlooking the ocean with a wise old man and a fishing rod, just pulling up fishies on demand. Technically, they are not wrong, and it makes us want to visit this fish shop even more.

We love sushi, so if we could get the freshest sashimi in the world, sign us up. We already have the rice steaming and the fish will be the last part. If anyone wants to come they are welcome to. Just bring some booze, and we will have a sushi party late into the night.

What!? Not all bobcats are named Bob?! Then where did their name come from? Are they even cats? Is there any truth to tnaything anymore? Now, are you going to tell us not all jackrabbits are named Jack?! What else are we supposed to call them? Robert-cats don't have the same ring.

The Carroll County Veterinary Clinic obviously have some very sharp minds on their staff. If they handle their sign so well, we have no doubt they would treat our dog well. Now we just need to get a dog. Or a cat. Better yet — a bobcat named Bob. That'll show 'em.

Please give us less information by writing more information. This sign doesn’t help anyone at all get to your place of business or understand when it's open. Yes, those colorful block letters do brighten up the place but do they have to come at the expense of actual information?

We can’t be sitting outside waiting for you to decide to work. We have our own lives too. Can you please just put your hours of business outside instead of this sign? We just want to order our food and then go home to binge “Altered Carbon” on Netflix. Is that too much to ask?

We can’t argue with this logic. Every time we are in an argument with the wife, she ends up being right even if we have a better argument. No matter what we try, it always seems like she wins. So next time we need to pee it makes it easy to remember which way to turn.

This needs to be standardized because we don’t want to build this muscle memory only to accidentally walk into the wrong bathroom at the next place of business. Then again, the whole issue of who goes into what bathroom is getting a little dicey lately so we might prefer to just rid ourselves of the whole experience and water a tree or two.

Not all signs get us laughing, but this one did. Plus, it gave us a crash course in basic tool recognition. They nailed it right on the head! We thought they would hammer home their pun and they didn’t screw it up. It pulley-ed us in as soon as we saw it and we gave them credit!

We will file this one away next time we need a good hardware joke. It can fit in our toolbox of other puns next to our other ones. It should measure up next time. Yes, those are all the topic-appropriate puns we have so far. Now we need a nap.

Forget the cameras, this is about comfort as it is about common sense — why would you pee in the sand when there’s the big toilet right next to you? And don’t get mad at us and say, “Oh gross. I would never pee in the water!” You would be lying and we all know you pee in the water too. Plus, fish do it all the time.

Things can be a little different when we're talking about a pool, though. Don't pee in pools, people. As much as we would like to believe it, chlorine doesn’t actually disinfect that much.

There was a 50% chance the baby would turn into a cat and a 50% chance it would stay a baby. So while the woman had the baby door closed the child existed in a superposition of half baby and half cat. Only when she opened the door again did the baby/cat function collapse into a cat.

Pretty cool that we learned about quantum mechanics while changing our cat baby. Now that the woman's offspring is a cat and not a human, we wonder what she would do with all the baby stuff at home. Does anybody need a stroller?

Aww, how nice! The sign makers could have stayed with plain silhouettes but instead, they went the extra mile to help the cows feel included. They didn’t need to add the stripe, but they did anyway. This is the kind of thing that makes the cows feel seen, respected, and validated. Good job, sign maker. Ten out of ten.

Now when we are traveling through that stretch of road we will keep our eyes peeled for those striped cows. We just hope a dairy cow doesn’t wander into the street nearby because if they did we would be woefully unprepared.

When we first saw this sign, we were curious to know how many people actually took them up on their offer and stripped down to their birthday suits completely in order to come in without a mask. Though, to be honest, there is a chance they would choose to strip as an act of solidarity with the cats in this cat cafe, who walk around in their birthday suits all the time.

We know how good it feels to feel the breeze on our skin, but that’s in the privacy of your backyard, not at the local cat cafe. Good luck to management because they may be in for a rude awakening with this sign.

We weren’t thinking of robbing this taxi cab driver for his money, but now that he has 7 Spice Girl cassettes we are reconsidering. We shouldn’t, but do you know how many eBay auctions we have lost trying to get the “Spiceworld” album?!

Too many! Wow, what we would give for that album… Maybe going to jail would be worth it. The cabbie shouldn’t have advertised his possessions if he wasn’t asking for trouble. Also, let's talk about those Sherk piñatas. If he's got two of them he wouldn't mind missing one, right? We have a feeling it will be a hoot at our cousin's quinceanera.

You would think that a prophecy class could see that issue coming, but apparently not. Isn’t that the entire thing of prophecies? Maybe not knowing would be better. That sure would have helped Oedipus after he heard his prophecy. 

We know they are not in an ancient Greek tragedy, but still, be nimble so you can flow with events even if you don’t see them coming. That's our sage advice. Maybe there is a lesson in this sign. Maybe the person giving the class saw some things that are better left unseen and just decided to call the whole thing off and spare everyone else the horrors.

It's unfortunate that he is sitting right beneath that sign. Yes, it made us giggle, but we are not proud of that. He had no choice in his hair color. He may not even be creepy for all we know. We would need to see the woman’s face to confirm.

If she is creeped out by him then we will take it all back and be glad we laughed at it earlier. If we had to guess, though, we would say that the guy here has always been teased about his hair color and decided to reclaim it, naming his personal brand of craft beer after it. More power to you, dude.

Even when we are down, it’s nice to know someone has your back, and for this signmaker, it’s their middle finger. It has their back and will stick up for them no matter what.

We hope our middle finger does the same for us because we need it when times get tough, and we all know that during these past couple of years it’s comforting knowing someone will always be there for you. We wonder if the rest of the fingers did the same when the time was right. You know, like when Signmaker knew the answer to a question in class, or when a pinky swear was due.

We were expecting a historical landmark when we saw the first half of the sign and then were utterly disappointed when we saw the second half. We guess that is what the creators were going for with the sign, but still, that is mean.

This seems like a very British joke to play, and although we are extremely unsatisfied we salute you for the joke played on us and on everyone who has seen this. And, to be fair, they weren't trying to sell us any product or service we don't need so we guess it could have been worse.

This veterinary clinic must have a comedian working for them because they frequently change their front sign and it always features a joke and that joke is always funny. Except for this one, which is only funny provided that it is not based on a true story.

Just because we thought dogs are man's best friend and we don't want it to only apply when food is not involved. We love our pets and we think better of them than preferring leftovers over the survival of their caregivers. Hopefully, we don’t ever have to find out how much truth this joke actually has.

Honestly, we are wearier of the shady cat than we are of the dog. Just look at that feline, it looks like it is ready to claw your eyes out if you get too close. Either that or just talk smack about you behind your back, which is not very cool either.

We are glad there was a warning for the cat under the dog sign as well. Otherwise, we might have tried to pet it and come away with two fewer eyes (or just some trust issues). Plus it’s a black cat which is essentially a very small black panther.

We know that the person who came up with that sign must have thought they were on to something here. However, while getting some happy juice before you face another day in the office may sound like a good idea, we don’t know if brewing a morning cup of pinot is the best thing to do at 7 am.

If that were the case, we may only last until 11 am before we end up slumped under our desks taking a nap to stave off the afternoon hangover. We would be far less productive if this sign was true. Plus, hot wine doesn't sound all that great.

North Country Wines & Spirits are obviously enjoying their own supply a little too much. In fact, we aren't sure how they were able to put up all those letters in order considering how hard their livers must be working. But frankly, we're on their side.

We love whiskey as much as the next person, and if we are going to drink every day it better be Glenmorangie. This sign is certainly for anyone who enjoys more than just the occasional drink! Give us some top-shelf liquor because if we are going to become unproductive members of society we might as well enjoy what we are drinking.

These two signs beat the heck out of the "Live, Laugh, Love" thing we see all too often in Pinterest boards of new grandmothers who have just discovered the joys of knitting. No shade to those grandmas, though. They make the best cookies.

You can’t go wrong with either sign if you are looking to spice up your home. Both had us laughing and honestly, you should just get both. Your guests and visitors will love it and it will make them laugh too. Plus, if you get both of them you can't be accused of gender discrimination — this way everyone is equally mocked!

PSA: Please don't wash your feet in the toilet, people! For that matter please don't wash ANYTHING in the toilet. Do you realize the amounts of bacteria just swimming around in there? We totally understand wanting to keep our feet clean, but that’s not the way to do it. Especially if it’s a public toilet! Just stick to a shower and a sponge, please!

That being said, if anyone was to invent a toilet-like fixture for feet washing, we think it would be pretty awesome. Imagine a chair that comes with an attached foot basin that can have soapy water swirling around your feet with the push of a button. What a dream!

This sign is great for Halloween and organ collectors (though usually, those who are in charge of harvesting or transporting organs don't offer to sell them. Let alone have a sale. But maybe it's different with rancid items. We obviously don't know enough about the ways of this world).

We can already imagine putting it next to the bowl of candy for the trick-or-treaters in October and putting mannequin parts covered in ketchup to sell the illusion. We are sure it will be a hit with everyone and hopefully get a few laughs. Excuse us as we head to our nearest Halloween store.

No one wants a zombie apocalypse, but we hope zombies know how to read if it ever happens. They will be rendered immobile once they read it and be confined to the graveyards. We are sure we can mass produce the signs if that is the case and keep the undead army at bay.

Fingers crossed it will work because we are not the best fighters when there are no gaming consoles involved. Of course, this is all assuming they turned into zombies in their graves. If they were bitten or infected by the zombie virus while out shopping at the mall, then there isn't much anyone can do about it and we're all doomed.

We love to support local businesses and this sign is just pointing you in the right direction. We wouldn’t want the owners to starve and after hiking in the woods all day this seems like the perfect place to grab a bite to eat. After all, there is nothing like a day of hiking to make your hunger strong and your standards weak.

Not that we're implying that this place has bad food, we're just saying that even microwaved beans will taste like a Michelin-star delicacy after a day-long walk through the forest. We hope the restaurant is open 24/7 because if it is then we might have to make it a regular thing for our weekly camping trip.

What a novel concept! Using your turn signals! If we had a dollar for every time we saw a driver making a turn without using their signal, we could afford to hire a driver of our own! And that driver would literally be paid to use the turn signals like a responsible adult who didn't pay a DMV official to pass driver's ed.

Come on people, it is not that hard to pull the lever and tell people which way you are turning. They will be thankful and it will cause fewer honks out there. Unless you want to be a menace to society then continue not signaling.