Get a Hobby
Found in Key West cemetery, this witty headstone belongs to Alan Dale Willcox. We don’t know much about this man apart from him obviously being a funny guy. He must have been a hoot at parties.
We could also venture to guess he had some interesting hobbies himself. We bet his hobbies were unique and unexpected. Maybe basket weaving and miniature house building.
Oh, Man...
It appears that Mitchell is not too happy about this whole dying thing, but that didn't stop him from making one last joke to lighten the mood.
Don't worry, Mitchell, it may not be what you expected, but all new beginnings take some getting used to, and with your sense of humor, we're sure it will happen in no time.
Die Hard Fan
While many choose to adorn their graves with elements such as religious symbols, flowers, or similar decorations, some have other ideas. You can count on a Star Wars fan to ask to be laid to rest under a tombstone worthy of a real Jedi.
May the force be with you, Theodore.
No Longer Interrupting
Good news for people that would rather be svelte in the rear – death is a great way to lose weight. These two headstones tell the truth, even if they are missing an apostrophe to make them grammatically correct. Skeletons are well-known for their shapely behinds, even if they are often the best part.
Sadly, the gluteus muscle fades away just like the rest of the body, which means they certainly do lose weight, just not in that way. Or, maybe, these two people were always inserting themselves into other conversations, and now they have no way to do so.
Classic Deadly Poems
If you think you've ever gotten mad that a package wasn't on time, just think about the tale of Lester Moore. He was a Wells Fargo office clerk who was shot dead by an enraged customer when the package was delivered damaged. It still happens today, but we imagine it was even more common back when this headstone was created.
The irate customer used a .44 pistol and dumped four shots into poor Lester, resulting in his death. Did all tombstones from the nineteenth century have pithy poems written on them or just this one?