How often can you point to something that is called both a salad and a dessert? Too many times, especially since one of the times is ambrosia salad. It’s practically a Christmas tradition in a number of Southern states to supply this…part of the meal. It uses mandarin oranges, pineapples, coconut, and mini marshmallows.
But there are lots of recipes that throw in things like strawberries, bananas, cherries, pecans, whipped cream, yogurt, or cottage cheese. That is quite a lot of stuff, and it all kinda mashes into a big mess when you try to eat it. It came about thanks to the trade routes in the South making citrus fruits so much more readily available. Even better, you can serve it in any dish that will allow a spoon.
The Midwest’s Worst – Watergate Salad
This crazy concoction is known as pistachio delight, green goddess, shut the gate salad, green goop, green fluff, and green stuff, but there are plenty of people out there who simply know it as gross. It’s made from mini marshmallows, pecans, and a lot of pineapple chunks in a bowl of pistachio pudding.
It got its start from a recipe on the back of a Jell-O Pistachio Flavor Pudding box in the middle of the eighties. For some reason, another name was added during the nineties, one that has stuck with the odd dish: Watergate Salad. It doesn’t taste very good, and it’s not very fun to eat, but at least it’s quick! You just throw a whole bunch of stuff into a bowl and serve it. Nobody will notice it doesn’t taste right.
Vermont’s Worst – Sugar on Snow
Vermont is famous for its delicious maple syrup, but even they sometimes make critical missteps when it comes to this format of sugar. Consider the classic treat known as sugar on snow, which is literally just that. It has a mere two ingredients: maple syrup, and snow. No, we aren’t kidding. Preferably, the snow is fresh and clean, because we should darn well hope it is!
You fill a pan with the snow, boil some maple syrup, and drizzle it over the snow. Once the syrup cools and hardens, it’s easy to eat. This option is often served alongside doughnuts, black coffee, and pickles, which is presumably so you can get the taste of syrup snow out of your mouth. If you have to serve doughnuts with something, we don’t know if it’s a great option.
California’s Worst – Fortune Cookie
Opening up a fortune cookie after a meal of takeout Chinese is so ingrained in most of us that not having a fortune cookie seems like a crime. You get to crack them open and laugh at the “fortune” that is inside, and then maybe eat the cookie, too. They were invented in California, which just goes to show you most of the bad stuff comes from California.
The cookies are dry, hard, and almost tasteless. While the fortunes might not be tasteless, they are best adjusted by adding something like “in the bathroom” or “in the bedroom” to the end of them, which will be far funnier than the confusing ice cream koans that they usually have. Have you ever seriously gotten a real fortune from one of these?
Iowa’s Worst – Snickers Salad
It says salad, but it’s more like a dessert if you can even call it that. It certainly isn’t a salad – any salad that has a literal candy bar in it doesn’t belong at the table. But what else is inside this dish? It has things like whipped cream, Granny Smith apples (specifically that kind, for some weird reason), and pudding.
You’ll also find nuts of varying amounts or varieties, caramel, coconut, and more. How do you make it? It’s simple: chop all the stuff and put it in a bowl. That’s all it takes. It will probably take you longer to buy the stuff and get it home from the store. You’ll also have to chop up Snickers, even though it seems better just to serve those as the dessert.