Of course, someone named Dave would pull this at a restaurant. Daves tend to focus on their music most of all, even if it means embarrassing themselves in a public place. This particular Dave must have really been rocking out if he didn’t remember that his music was coming from his headphones and not from speakers on the ceiling.
We have to assume that he was listening to some of his favorite Bossa Nova songs, or maybe a little bit of Louis Anderson if he thought that his gas was going to escape notice. At least something with a tuba.
So It's Not Going Well, Then
Hey now, eggs are great. They're high in protein, they taste great, and they're surprisingly low in calories as long as you don't add things like cheese or butter. Sure, they might not be the best thing for your cholesterol, but there are lots of other bad things, and you need some cholesterol, anyway.
But, this person must have gotten some of the information scrambled when he started meal planning, picking up chocolate eggs instead of the chicken kind. Remember all those good things you just learned about eggs? The chocolate variety doesn't have any of that.
Just Wait. He'll Get It Eventually
Try this the next time you're busy with a project and don't want to get dragged into a long text convo with someone who doesn't know the meaning of “do not disturb.” It's not the kind of tactic that will work for everybody, but don't be surprised if even one of your smarter friends falls for it.
Of course, you still run the risk of meeting up for the next time and having your friend slap you across the head. Or, maybe it will be the kind of thing that you can use over and over for the most oblivious of pals.
We all have this friend. You know the one. The one where you can make a joke that is one hundred percent making fun of them, and they might not even notice. And even if they do, they're cool with it!
They're the punching bag, the butt monkey, the fool of the group. But the fool is one of the most important parts of any group of friends since it allows people to bond against a common “foe.” Of course, he or she is just a friend like any other. Poor Nikki here is one of these people, and her friends are better for it.
It's Open and Shut
To call this one a cold case is to do it a little bit of a disservice. Investigators were stumped when the Egyptian army disappeared and their slaves escaped across what should have been impassible water, but we're pretty sure the statute of limitations has passed for this one.
It's strange to send a question about what appears to be a legal question to a number that you don't know. Blue went with the flow, however, and played along, even if it was a little off-the-cuff and might have brought up an angry response. Thankfully, everything was cool.