Yes, by all accounts, the move to the afterlife is one that is hard to screw up. There aren’t any other paths, no winding streets, and most theories say there is some sort of guide, just in case. No matter where you’re headed, you’ll get there.
And good thing, too, because this dearly departed must have been legendary for her ability to get lost. It happens to all of us every once in a while, and the advent of GPS has made many people far more reliable, but poor Lexie here wasn’t able to make use of such modern advances.
Hitting Them Hard
At the end of a long life, a lot of us will have no choice but to look back at some of the mistakes we've made. This man has done a similar thing – despite, as the included information tells us, that he is still alive.
He made a headstone calling two of his wives the meanest women in the world while he was still alive. What chutzpah. If he dies under suspicious circumstances, we know exactly who to investigate. There's even a little bit of rhyming thrown in there, too. This man's an artist and likes to live dangerously.
That's What You Get for Fiddling
An artist is never respected in his own time. Van Gogh, Sylvia Plath, Otis Redding...and Kelly, the fiddler. We all know this Kelly character, don't we? With his famous song...okay, maybe not every artist is going to be remembered long after death.
Since this fiddlin' cat died in the late stages of the nineteenth century in a poor house, you could say he's lucky to have a gravestone at all – especially one that has stood the test of time so well. Maybe the cemetery (or graveyard, there is a difference) updates the stones to keep them in good condition.
The Standard Order
It seems that even those no longer with us get hungry for some tasty food every once in a while. And not in a scary zombie way, either. The headstone up close shows us a couple with the last name "Burger." Look closely at the headstone on the right, and you'll find that the family has the name "Fries."
We'd love to say this was planned, but even if the people picking their plots noticed, they might not have cared much. Burial plots are pricey. The headstone on the left probably doesn't say “Coke,” though we really wish it did.
This Guy Was a Dad
Not only was he a father, but he was a medical personnel of some kind as well – the Caduceus, the rod with two snakes, is a dead giveaway. If the epitaph is any indication, it seems he was also a fan of shutting up and letting others think you're stupid, rather than opening your mouth and removing all doubt.
Whether he asked for this to be added to his final resting place, or his family decided it was the best memorial, it must have been best to talk smart around this doc.