You go through life trying not to get squashed by the thumb or the boot heel of anybody above you. You fight your way out, never let anybody have your reigns, and finally reach the end of your life, a free man. What’s the best way to celebrate? Put a snappy epitaph on your tombstone, of course.
The fact that the line is in quotes tells us that it’s something Alexander Sawyer Houston was known to have said, and his loved ones decided that it was a good way to memorialize him. He was just that kinda guy.
It's All I Have Left
Birth date? Not important. Death date? Nobody's business. Other details of her life, such as what she accomplished, her family, and loved ones? Doesn't matter as long as you keep off the grass. It's traditionally poor form to stand right on top of someone's grave – it's been said you can feel it.
This tiny hunter wanted to ensure she never had to deal with that sort of thing, so she added a note for people to stay away. We're sure it's all in good fun, of course, but it is strange there isn't anything else on the headstone.
The Other One. No, the Other Other One
While we have, sadly, lost the legendary Betty White the same way we lose everyone, this Betty White went a bit earlier. She also wanted to make sure that there was no confusion about which Betty White was being mourned when people took a trip to her grave.
We have to imagine there are quite a number of Betty Whites out there — it isn't the most complicated name. Is it annoying to be confused for a famous person constantly? We imagine that there's a really good reason why this sort of thing ended up on this lady's headstone.
Never to Be Forgotten
Now here's a headstone you'll remember. It didn't just have some words carved on there — you got to see Shawn Lee Miller Welsh in his full, mustachioed and mulleted glory, wreathed in tire smoke from what was, presumably, his winningest whip. The man was a champion drag racer which, of course, means he gets a better headstone than most.
Just imagine the time and effort that went into etching this complicated image. Obviously, computers do most of the hard work, but it's so much more complicated than a standard stone. People must have been nervous about messing it up.
This Seems Planned
At first, it looks like this is a rather unfortunate tombstone – most people would rather not be associated with such flatulence after they pass away – but we'd like to think that Art has a rather good sense of humor. Who cares if people laugh at his name after he's gone?
Maybe some kids will see it and laugh while being dragged through the graveyard to visit a grandparent and get a smile on their faces. Maybe family members will smile and remember Art for his jokes and gags, and try to forget the smells that sometimes escaped.